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1·I might get up, but if I got up and looked at it, ten to one I shouldn't be able to say for certain; because once a thing's done, no one ever knows how it happened.

我本来可以站起来，但是，即使我站起身来瞧瞧它，十之八九我也说不出它到底是什么；因为一旦一件事发生以后，就没有人能知道它是怎么发生的了。

2·Looks can be deceiving, but it got me to wondering if there are certain nuances of a guy's place that tip off that he's single.

眼睛是可能被欺骗的，但这使我好奇起来：是否在男生们住的地方真有一些细微的差别来泄露他们是否单身呢？

3·The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant. He has mastered their frightful tongue (something akin to mole speak) and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move.

它精通了人类可怕的语言（类似于鼹鼠语言），它还时常和他们说话，我确定它报告了我的一举一动。